In real life: First you need to decide what it is you’re looking for. Do you want to be in a D/s relationship, or are you just seeking kinky relief? It is important to understand that just wanting something doesn’t mean you’ll get it, you have to put in work. If you want something based around only your needs, your desires and your time, without thought of serving anyone but yourself, then you need to hire a Dominatrix. A professional won’t take up much of your time, can take care of your needs and loves to take your money. If you want to serve and gain pleasure from being helpful lifestyle might be right for you but it is time consuming, it's a full time job you don’t get paid for. Your reward is being in the presence of a Goddess and being allowed in her world. ‘I’ll do anything for you Mistress’ is something we hear everyday, especially from submissive men, those are just words, you need to back up what you say, don’t just say things you think I want to hear. What makes me happy? When you complete a task without being asked, carry my bags, open all doors, tribute and support. If you want to be in the lifestyle, be more than just a mindless slave who needs to be babysat and have their hand held. Take pride in your service and know we are a team. Too many submissive men think that just by saying they’ll do what I want, I’ll want them to do it. It takes time to teach tasks to a new sub, I have specific requirements I don’t want to take the time to teach if it's not going anywhere. My kink comes from being in control of a man who is strong, intelligent, and loyal. I want a sub who can anticipate my needs and takes action, not a doorknob. I want a confident, passionate sub who is willing to expand their kink to levels they have never dreamed of before. Have something to offer before you expect something in return that is a good way to stand out.
Online: Do your research to find out if you are talking to a reputable Dominatrix. A Professional Mistress will have a Gallery of photos, Social media, and possibly a website. It is not unusual for a Mistress to ask for a tribute before they begin talking to a sub online, however If it seems to good to be true, it usually is. Don’t confuse the real and the fake. I’m not your Mistress yet, and nor do I care for your BDSM equivalent of a pick up line. If you would like to approach a Mistress online without coming across as a complete idiot don’t just say ‘Hello, Mistress’ or ‘Gorgeous Photos’ that is not a good opening statement anywhere online. I personally will not respond. Read the website to find out protocols on to find out how to contact Mistress. Don’t start a letter with a list of stuff you want to try that is called topping from the bottom. Don’t confuse a video Mistress with Pro/Lifestyle Mistress they are not the same. We are not all the same as the fem-dom porn you watch. That is not all of us, we don’t all do that. Porn clips cannot reflect what it’s like to serve a dominant in real life. Have realistic expectation and know its not all about you. Let your guard down and give your submission it is the most beautiful gift you can give.
Ready to start looking?
Here is a list of reputable website to find a Pro